We all have secrets, things or traits about ourselves we keep hidden from the world at large. For some, it might be an out of control collection of Star War memorabilia; for others, it may be endless hours spent on Facebook playing Farmville II. Every person has at least one secret passion and when it gets out of control, it typically becomes an addiction. I myself have an addiction to reality TV – I know, a lot of people do.
However, my secret, shameful addiction is the genre of reality TV I enjoy: women behaving badly. I don’t know why but I cannot seem to get enough of women acting out and watching it being portrayed as some sort of reality…
My addiction started innocently enough. I saw one episode of Bad Girls Club and I was hooked – pretty ladies, all behaving outrageously. Every day was like a scene from “Spring Break for Strippers.” The thing is, I remember that the early seasons of The Bad Girls Club had a noble intention. The house guests were all young women that had come to realize that they “…needed to change” and they came to the Bad Girls House to “…work on themselves.” However, after probably season three, the ratings had morphed the show into a pseudo women’s prison in some exotic location, based in a previously gorgeous house that had been debased by lots of pink paint, neon, fun fur and tasteless furnishings. And it had to have a pool.
Every season at least one (or more) mattresses end up being tossed in the pool in an effort to make a girl leave the house. And each episode begins with two ladies as “besties” and always ends with them having a knockdown, drag out bitch fight. Still, I watch – this season the “bad girls” are in the ATL (that’s Atlanta for the uninformed…)
After the Bad Girls, I discovered the sirens of Jerseylicious. Olivia, Tracy and Alexa alternate between being best friends and worst enemies, all while sporting a seemingly radioactive, orange spray-tanned glow, especially Tracy. These ladies all work in the beauty business and, quite honestly, would be fired from any respectable salon after one day. I’m not saying that they are not talented beauty “peeps” but the shouting, the verbal altercations – the fashions! – any of these violations would get a “normal” person fired, or at least put on probation, immediately. I mean, whose reality is this anyway?
By season two of Jerseylicious, I was hooked – I needed even more more ladies with breast implants behaving badly, so I started scanning the program guide for more and more “reality” to feed my addiction. I got my next high from Mob Wives.
Renee, Carla, Karen and Drita (Dreeter, if you are from Longk Eyeluhnd) are all lovely ladies somehow connected to organized crime families, either by birth or marriage. These high-spirited gals wait patiently for their men as they do prison time and apparently are all independently wealthy. With the possible exception of Karen, none of these ladies appear to work (Karen wrote a “tell-all” book and is partners in a salon). I like these ladies – they are kinda’ like Bad Girls 4.0, all grown-up with breast implants and Botox injections. They all cuss like sailors, every one of them. I’m not sure why but hearing beautiful women swear like seasoned seamen makes me giggle…
These ladies are all tough acts to follow – in the most literal sense – but I have recently discovered two new packs of wild women. The ladies of Big Rich Atlanta are fantastic. Sisters Harvin and Meyer? Perfection. And Big Rich Atlanta has a dancing preacher (female), an interior designer (married and divorced many times) and the wife of some obscure rap icon (who is he?) And, as if Harvin and Meyer weren’t enough, with cast members named Sharlinda, Kahidijiha and Ashlee, you KNOW this show is gonna’ be amazing! Big Rich Atlanta and Bad Girls Club ATL? I’m not sure why Atlanta is such a hotbed for reality TV right now, but “Thanks, ATL.”
Recently I have been reintroduced to the quartet of Gypsy Sisters. I have trouble keeping it all straight – how they are all related – but Mellie, Nettie, Kayla and Laura are pure TV ridiculousness! Gorgers, muskers and other characters make this show a must-see for me!
I know this confession probably makes me look bad but, hey, they say ownership and admission is the first step on the road to recovery. I just hope I don’t totally recover before I get to see Mellie’s hot pink and leopard wedding dress on Gypsy Sisters – or was that Tracy’s wedding dress on Jerseylicious?
O.M.G. – these episodes cannot air soon enough for me!!!