Being Open and Honest

I know I have shared here a few times that I am a devotee of therapy. I have been in therapy, off and on, for the better part of probably twenty years now. I like to think of myself as a fairly “whole” person but, certainly at one time, I was far from it. I wore a mask every day to have the necessary “face” to get through – get through work, get through situations, just get through life, period.

I am a much more open, genuine and true person now. Oh sure, I still have a few different faces, but not the inventory I once had. Wearing all those masks was exhausting…

Removing a MaskSo, today I am thinking about the masks we each wear every day. I am in this place because someone I love very much has been sorta’ “keeping” something from me – all of my family, really – in an effort to protect us and “not have us worry.” I’m not really sure of all of the details (this party has not been totally forthcoming yet!) but, as always, I am preparing for the worst and still hoping for the best. It’s all I can do – it is my nature to always want the fairy tale ending, with everyone happy and perfect and every “loose end” not only tied up nice and tight, but tied in a pretty bow.

I know. I just confessed to almost two decades of therapy, yet I still want the happy ending. Who doesn’t, right? Anyway, I hope the “truth” I suspect is coming is wrong, and I also hope this person will now finally be comfortable and ego-less enough to tear down all the pretense and “how-it’s-supposed to-be’s” to be honest with all of us and let us in. That’s all I want, really – to be let in… I know it’s hard, believe me, to admit that each of us is not super human and needs no one. None of us are an island – we all need each other, for love and support, for advice, for an extra set of eyes to help us see, an extra pair of ears to help us listen, for an extra long pair of arms just to hug and hold us. It is not when we shut people out and need no one that we are strongest; it is when we open up, are vulnerable and feel like we are maybe at our weakest point that we are at our most powerful.

I hope this person will shed the mask, see all the love we have for him and let us in to help and support. It is exhausting trying to be completely independent and alone…

Face revealed

 

One response to “Being Open and Honest

  1. Such an important lesson Tim!! To be ‘let in’ is the ultimate compliment someone can pay us, I believe. Thanks for this post!

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