This coming weekend is Memorial Day, the three-day holiday weekend that traditionally “kicks off” summer – a weekend of BBQ’s and get-togethers, and parades and fireworks and fun. And as if three days wasn’t great already, I actually have a FOUR day weekend ahead. Four days. Four WHOLE days of fun. Sigh… I’m already exhausted.
I’m tired because I am anticipating what I refer to as “The Burden of Holiday Weekends.”
What is the burden? The burden of holiday weekends is meeting the expectations of BBQ’s, get-togethers, parades, fireworks and fun. I always feel that, unless I can “check” off everything on this list, I will have failed. I will have failed as a spouse, I will have failed as a holiday celebrator, I will have failed, period.
I suffer from MHAD (Moderate Holiday Anxiety Disorder – not a real disease, yet!) I get so anxious just worrying about the GREAT time I am supposed to have – and sustain! – for 3 or 4 days that I actually become resentful of time off. Weird, right? And this weekend will be a trial for sure. See, my spouse and I are coming off a week of human-companioning our besties’ amazing dog. While it has been a really fun week, and we love them and the dog like crazy, the two of us have been away from our home for what will ultimately be eight days. So, while I would like to go home, be with my Sweetie in our place and just chill, I feel the “burden” of celebrating away the weekend.
On top of that, my Beloved is going on a five-week holiday to Europe in a little over a month, so I feel that timeline ticking away in my head, too. Don’t get me wrong – I am super happy he is able to go and, this trip more than ever, I can say “Goodbye for now” at the airport and know he will return home to me safe and sound. Still, it will be a long time apart and while we are both excited for him and this trip, we are both a little anxious.
It looks like this: time away from home x human-companioning + future separation anxiety = holiday buzzkill (me).
Memorial Day weekend is not the only holiday that suffers – I have similar feelings near every holiday, even Ground Hog Day, LOL. I don’t know why I am “wrapped” this way; I just am. But, somehow, I will muster through it all. I WILL have a GREAT time with my Sweetie and our friends, and I WILL enjoy myself. I will. Now, time to get those BBQ’s scheduled. Oh, and I WILL take a bratwurst, a hot dog AND a chicken breast, please…